I began this blog with the hope to help just one person. I began as myself. The moment I got the "I don't understand why you do what YOU do." BS, I began to hide again. Walls came UP...
1. What or who am I protecting?
2. Why did I start this in the first place?
3. Does hiding my identity help or hurt the fact that I am deciding to be an advocate for mental health?
4. Am I trying to protect my career? Why?
5. Why do I worry about what people think about me?
Today I realized that I am the one who was helped. The conversation has begun. One of my amazing friends and I had a very enlightening conversation about the ups and downs of our bi-polar diagnosis like I have never had in my life. She is finally researching and realizing how important an action plan actually is. I wish I would have had a mentor growing up, but I AM thankful for my journey.
I started my post as myself but later decided on the pseudonym Iva Hardtime. While I may have a hard time most days, I know that I can push forward. I will most likely gain courage as time goes by. Growing up I have always been very hardheaded especially when someone tells me how I shouldn't or can't do something. Though that mindset hasn't always been positive, I am older and don't like eating crow pie. I am me. This struggle is real, but I don't need to be known right now. Or do I? I still struggle with the stigma within my own mind.
#keeptheconversationgoing #bi-polar #thestruggleisreal
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